Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
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