quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Randomize
