I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Randomize
