i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
Randomize
