Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize
