eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Randomize
