Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
Randomize
