i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
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