I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I will be naked everywhere
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
