It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
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