Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Randomize