i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
