conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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