In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Randomize
