It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
