the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
