bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
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