C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
someone get that fucking seahorse.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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