eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Randomize
