Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
In America we eat man semen.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Randomize
