Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
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