yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
I just blew my weed a kiss
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
that is very illegal...i love you.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
