one word: firstdatebathroomanal
They should really pass out barf bags in church
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
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