How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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