My brain says no but my pants say off.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
