Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
