OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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