I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
