The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Randomize
