My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
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