did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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