i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I wanna passion pit in your ass
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
Randomize
