We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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