You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
please come you make the beer taste better
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Randomize
