whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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