you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
