butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
