is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Randomize
