your thong is hanging out like whoa
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
