you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Randomize
