you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Randomize
