I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
this boner is exhausting
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
