what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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