she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
