I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
