Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
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