At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
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