i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
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