..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
