Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
